In addition to his supposed inability to lie
about chopping down his father's cherry tree,
most have heard about George Washington's
wooden dentures, which were actually made
from hippopotamus tusk designed to fit
over one remaining tooth after losing the rest
to a penchant for cracking Brazilian nuts
between his teeth. He probably would have
been better off yanking it out since the hippos'
rubbing against it led to an opium habit.
Not knowing a Brazilian nut from any other,
I don't understand what about it is so irresistable
to cause a disciplined military strategist to destroy
his jaw until there was nothing left
but a sole agonizing nub.
Ted Millar’s work has appeared in English Journal, A Sufferer’s Digest, Middle West Press, redrosethorns, Moss Piglet, Isele, 365 Tomorrows, October Hill, Syncopation, 50 Word Stories, Warp 10, Fictional Cafe, Little Somethings Press, Grand Little Things, Words and Whispers, Fleas on the Dog, Better Than Starbucks, Straight Forward Poetry, Reflecting Pool: Poets and the Creative Process (Codhill Press, 2018), Crossways, Caesura, Circle Show, The Broke Bohemian, The Voices Project, Third Wednesday, Tiny Poetry: Macropoetics, Scintilla, Inklette, The Grief Diaries, Cactus Heart, Aji, Wordpool Press, The Artistic Muse, Chronogram, Brickplight and Inkwell. In addition to writing poetry, he serves as the committee chair for the Marlborough, NY Democratic Committee, and administrates the Substack newsletter, The Left Place. He lives in the heart of apple and wine country in New York's Hudson Valley with his wife and two children.
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